


Reflection

by Shiisiln



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Character Study, Father-Son Relationship, Gen, Identity Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-12
Updated: 2016-02-12
Packaged: 2018-05-19 16:28:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 582
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5974080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shiisiln/pseuds/Shiisiln
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For a long time, Edward hated how much he looked like his father.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Reflection

**Author's Note:**

> A big thanks to Spazztastic-Muffin for beta reading! (And for suggesting the perfect title. 8D)

For a long time, Edward hated how much he looked like his father.

He and Al both had his blonde hair and bright golden eyes, of course, but if you looked at them side by side it was easy to see who they took after; Al was rounded and soft-spoken like Trisha, whereas Edward had the same sharp angles and fierce scowl as Hohenheim.

But Edward hated to be compared to his father. Hated that he bore any trace of that stern, aloof man who featured distantly in his memories, who left when he was hardly old enough to understand what that meant.

The first time someone pointed out his braid and told him it reminded them of how Hohenheim wore his hair, he was filled with rage.

Because he hadn't started growing it out to imitate _him_ ; he'd been thinking of the soft curve of his mother's braid, the way it fell over her shoulder and tickled his cheek when she picked him up.

He'd been trying to capture some part of her for himself, to keep her close to his heart. He knew he wasn't anything like her, but he wanted the courage of thinking maybe he _could_ be, if he just tried hard enough.

He almost cut it all off after that, but he didn't want to give anyone the satisfaction of knowing he'd been rattled by the comparison.

But as much as the similarities chafed at him, the ways he was _different_ from his father were also troubling. He kept this image in his head of Hohenheim as a man who was cold but strong, untroubled by human emotion. Subconsciously, he measured himself to it.

Every time he made a careless mistake, every time his anger and fear and grief overtook him, every time he let his heart get the better of his head- he felt like he was riddled with flaws that made him weak.

Meeting Hohenheim at his mother's grave only highlighted those weaknesses. He spoke to Edward like he was a petulant child; like his sensitive nature was holding him back from the man he should be by now.

It only made him more determined than ever to be nothing like his father. He wouldn't ever abandon someone he cared about like Hohenheim had abandoned him and Al; he wouldn't let his kindness become a weakness. He wouldn't regret the past, he would keep looking towards the future.

When they met again in Reole, he was prepared for nothing but more pain, more tense exchanges where he was made to feel like a stupid kid.

He hadn't been expecting to find his father… softer than he remembered. Clumsy and awkward- kind of a dork, really. More… _human_ than the memory of a tall back and fierce, scowling golden eyes that lived in Edward's mind.

And he sure as hell hadn't been expecting to see Hohenheim _cry_. After Edward told him Trisha's last words, the tears had begun to fall, open and unashamed… he hadn't met Edward’s eyes, but he hadn't turned away either, and the pain on his face had been clear to see.

Afterward, Edward hadn't known how to feel. It wasn't like seeing him act vulnerable like that made up for the fact that he had left them, or erased the years of tension that lay between them, but…

But for the first time… he felt happy to have something in common with his father.

In fact, it almost made him feel _proud_.

**Author's Note:**

> I want a 100k fanfic of Hohenheim surviving at the end of brotherhood and bonding with his kids and being a dork. ;_; (God, imagine him meeting E'ds kids. Imagine Van Hohenheim as a grandfather. I'm dead inside.)


End file.
